His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?