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people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
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