my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...