The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Sponge bath it is.