He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
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I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
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Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.