he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
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Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
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Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.