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I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
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