decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?