Last Night in South Carolina (864)

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  and the officer said have you been drinking

  (864): View more from South Carolina

  and i said NOO SIR.

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  and he said, I am a woman.

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  So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  She announced her abortion via fbk

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  We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own

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