You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
23 Insane Reasons People Got Fired