Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
27 People Confess The Worst Jobs They’ve Ever Had
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.