He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?