He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.