He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.