My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...