He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
I dont know to explain this.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.