Texts From Last Night · Last Night in (660)

Last Night in Missouri (660)

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(660): View more from Missouri

THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.

(816): View more from Missouri

..So we should take it off Youtube?

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(660): THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you. (816): ..So we should take it off Youtube? http://tfl.nu/93os

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(660): View more from Missouri

what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?

(816): View more from Missouri

um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan

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(660): what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate? (816): um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan http://tfl.nu/0tla

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We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.

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(660): We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend. http://tfl.nu/9y0s

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My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)

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(660): My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :) http://tfl.nu/iyqj

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We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out

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(660): We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out http://tfl.nu/p80s

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(660): View more from Missouri

Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart

(281): View more from Texas

What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?

(660): View more from Missouri

Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni

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(660): Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart (281): What theme did he decide on for the bathroom? (660): Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni http://tfl.nu/hovp

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Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?

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(660): Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test? http://tfl.nu/cwr3

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I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.

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(660): I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better. http://tfl.nu/xn35

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I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.

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(660): I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush. http://tfl.nu/ahlc

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Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...

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(660): Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport... http://tfl.nu/e5jz

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Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.

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(660): Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes. http://tfl.nu/p00s

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I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.

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(660): I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym. http://tfl.nu/tj7a

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i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals

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(660): i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals http://tfl.nu/iisz

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And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.

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(660): And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this. http://tfl.nu/if6q

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I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.

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(660): I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night. http://tfl.nu/myre

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Last Night in Missouri (660)

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