Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.