We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
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I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
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You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself