He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY