My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
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I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
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I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed