yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.