So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..