Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
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The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
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I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.