I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
19 Parents Admit the Lies They’ve Told Their Children
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
21 Worst Confessions on a First Date
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.