I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
People With No Siblings Will Never Understand These 23 Things
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
25 Seemingly Normal Things That Give Some People Massive Anxiety
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs