this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand