Texts From Last Night · Last Night in (228)

Last Night in Mississippi (228)

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Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.

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(228): Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis. http://tfl.nu/q40e

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I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention

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(228): I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention http://tfl.nu/1mmd

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There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars

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(228): There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars http://tfl.nu/ue2i

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Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!

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(228): Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?! http://tfl.nu/8no9

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Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.

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(228): Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size. http://tfl.nu/ooxc

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Are you high right now?

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is that a question or a drake reference?

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(228): Are you high right now? (1-228): is that a question or a drake reference? http://tfl.nu/72z8

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yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations

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(228): yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations http://tfl.nu/eytk

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I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life

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(228): I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life http://tfl.nu/miua

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I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?

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probably "functioning vagina, must touch"

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(228): I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her? (601): probably "functioning vagina, must touch" http://tfl.nu/w791

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Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?

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(228): Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know? http://tfl.nu/qpy1

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I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?

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(228): I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL? http://tfl.nu/0gju

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I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"

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God bless us, everyone.

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(228): I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!" (601): God bless us, everyone. http://tfl.nu/p8dj

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I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."

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(228): I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult." http://tfl.nu/mdv1

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Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.

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(228): Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well. http://tfl.nu/vvbh

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We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver

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(228): We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver http://tfl.nu/kd5u

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Last Night in Mississippi (228)

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