When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.