i was born a porn star she said
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
I'm going to Hell for sure
now i know why i became what i already was.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Swine flu. Run for my life!
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.