he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul