You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK