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Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
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