I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
23 Bosses Confess The Craziest Thing They’ve Seen An Employee Do
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
19 People Confess What It’s Like To Have Sex With Someone That Is Transitioning
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off