Texts From Last Night

Last Night in Maryland (443)

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  (443): View more from Maryland

  they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"

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  (443): they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field" http://tfl.nu/je3y
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order

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  (443): Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order http://tfl.nu/s460
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  This is evicking siegelnvs

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  Im sorry?

  (410): View more from Maryland

  This is fucking ridiculous*

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  (410): This is evicking siegelnvs (443): Im sorry? (410): This is fucking ridiculous* http://tfl.nu/9l7k
  Replies (13) Good night (3558) Bad night (370)
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  So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.

  (443): View more from Maryland

  YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?

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  (410): So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed. (443): YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT? http://tfl.nu/cgqa
  Replies (13) Good night (3822) Bad night (368)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  I know, I was there.

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  (443): sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends (336): I know, I was there. http://tfl.nu/9p97
  Replies (1) Good night (1287) Bad night (366)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.

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  (443): I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans. http://tfl.nu/20x0
  Replies (6) Good night (2201) Bad night (361) Order T-Shirt
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  I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...

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  (443): I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket... http://tfl.nu/7x9r
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  i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country

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  (443): i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country http://tfl.nu/m3r6
  Replies (7) Good night (1938) Bad night (355) Order T-Shirt
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?

  (410): View more from Maryland

  haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background

  (443): View more from Maryland

  that only happened once.

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  (443): why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag? (410): haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background (443): that only happened once. http://tfl.nu/9rml
  Replies (36) Good night (4683) Bad night (354)
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  She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.

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  (443): She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk. http://tfl.nu/dqlg
  Replies (6) Good night (2445) Bad night (346)
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  so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse

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  so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though

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  (443): so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse (914): so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though http://tfl.nu/1ux5
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.

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  (443): Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies. http://tfl.nu/w2xc
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  My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.

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  (443): My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love. http://tfl.nu/12sb
  Replies (7) Good night (3191) Bad night (309)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk

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  (443): Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk http://tfl.nu/uult
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend

  (703): View more from Virginia

  You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.

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  (443): you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend (703): You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence. http://tfl.nu/no32
  Replies (4) Good night (1332) Bad night (303)