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FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
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