Texts From Last Night

Last Night in Pennsylvania (484)

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  he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him

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  (484): he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him http://tfl.nu/d2zc
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  New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport

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  (484): New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport http://tfl.nu/5bf4
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  I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control

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  (484): I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control http://tfl.nu/pmnn
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  Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.

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  (484): Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date. http://tfl.nu/zs6r
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  I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.

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  (484): I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid. http://tfl.nu/8dyc
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  im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste

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  (484): im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste http://tfl.nu/zz8f
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  i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win

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  (484): i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win http://tfl.nu/5w0f
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  He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?

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  A better fuck for starters.

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  (610): He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him? (484): A better fuck for starters. http://tfl.nu/qmis
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  I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem

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  (484): I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem http://tfl.nu/p4jh
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  sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now

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  sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?

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  :)

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  (484): sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now (1-484): sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up? (484): :) http://tfl.nu/8r3p
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  I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue

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  I'm in love

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  (484): I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue (484): I'm in love http://tfl.nu/im8q
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  Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture

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  (484): Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture http://tfl.nu/aclr
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  What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?

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  Which ones?

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  (484): What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips? (610): Which ones? http://tfl.nu/2pkr
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  Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.

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  (484): Totally smoking with fifteen year olds. http://tfl.nu/wzuc
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  problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.

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  (484): problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help. http://tfl.nu/wb6w
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