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Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
In the future we'll all be gay
Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
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