Texts From Last Night

Last Night in California (707)

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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?

  (707): View more from California

  ...did you eat that brownie?

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  (423): Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic? (707): ...did you eat that brownie? http://tfl.nu/j241
  Replies (2) Good night (2191) Bad night (377)
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  (916): View more from California

  1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.

  (707): View more from California

  *roof

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  (916): 1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor. (707): *roof http://tfl.nu/ph25
  Replies (6) Good night (1609) Bad night (366)
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  (707): View more from California

  After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.

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  (707): After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage. http://tfl.nu/9jeb
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  (707): View more from California

  im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.

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  (707): im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt. http://tfl.nu/7lkv
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  (707): View more from California

  Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.

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  (707): Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life. http://tfl.nu/o39j
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  (707): View more from California

  I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.

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  (707): I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night. http://tfl.nu/by2p
  Replies (3) Good night (1455) Bad night (351)
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  (707): View more from California

  That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on

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  (707): That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on http://tfl.nu/xdbh
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  (707): View more from California

  I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?

  (650): View more from California

  There is so much wrong with that sentence

  (707): View more from California

  Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real

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  (707): I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom? (650): There is so much wrong with that sentence (707): Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real http://tfl.nu/wzrt
  Replies (5) Good night (815) Bad night (328)
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  (707): View more from California

  Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.

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  (707): Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me. http://tfl.nu/6mha
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  (707): View more from California

  Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!

  (720): View more from Colorado

  True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.

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  (707): Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas! (720): True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place. http://tfl.nu/87wy
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  (707): View more from California

  because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.

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  (707): because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie. http://tfl.nu/erv7
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  (707): View more from California

  Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!

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  (707): Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that! http://tfl.nu/8zmt
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  (415): View more from California

  we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"

  (707): View more from California

  communist

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  (415): we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own" (707): communist http://tfl.nu/tujw
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  (707): View more from California

  Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.

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  (707): Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish. http://tfl.nu/itg6
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  (707): View more from California

  As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.

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  (707): As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment. http://tfl.nu/opoe
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