She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
These Attractive Criminals Took Sexy Mugshots That Made Them Famous
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.