I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Did we literally take a cab across the street
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker