She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.