I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...