YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.