Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.