Texts From Last Night

Last Night in Washington (425)

Sort By: Date / Good Night / Bad Night

• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche. http://tfl.nu/j1u9
  Replies (11) Good night (3583) Bad night (421) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy? http://tfl.nu/azer
  Replies (4) Good night (811) Bad night (418) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life http://tfl.nu/15hg
  Replies (14) Good night (1255) Bad night (402) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break. http://tfl.nu/5pkx
  Replies (21) Good night (2920) Bad night (399) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit." http://tfl.nu/w4dk
  Replies (8) Good night (1815) Bad night (394) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture. http://tfl.nu/ky0p
  Replies (4) Good night (1883) Bad night (393)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt http://tfl.nu/d0wp
  Replies (1) Good night (1398) Bad night (385)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi

  (425): View more from Washington

  hahaha how?

  (954): View more from Florida

  its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (954): i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi (425): hahaha how? (954): its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery http://tfl.nu/yw6o
  Replies (22) Good night (3888) Bad night (375)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.

  (206): View more from Washington

  The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy. (206): The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!! http://tfl.nu/5bns
  Replies (8) Good night (1474) Bad night (370)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility. http://tfl.nu/j5r5
  Replies (14) Good night (2541) Bad night (365)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible. http://tfl.nu/qw88
  Replies (3) Good night (737) Bad night (359) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?

  (425): View more from Washington

  Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again? (425): Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing. http://tfl.nu/l4cd
  Replies (11) Good night (4028) Bad night (358)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD http://tfl.nu/7k7x
  Replies (9) Good night (2148) Bad night (351) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.

  (1-425): View more from Washington

  I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help. (1-425): I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity. http://tfl.nu/3ise
  Replies (4) Good night (1229) Bad night (349)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by... http://tfl.nu/ardl
  Replies (6) Good night (1491) Bad night (334) Order T-Shirt