To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.