I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
These 21 Drunks Said The Darndest Things