Tap Here to view the Mobile Optimized TFLN
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
Follow @tfln
Cracked IndieClick Humor