Last Night in Ontario (226)

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?

  (226): View more from Ontario

  Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?

  (647): View more from Ontario

  Oh definitely.

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• (226): View more from Ontario

  I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor

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• (226): View more from Ontario

  Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..

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• (226): View more from Ontario

  Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.

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• (226): View more from Ontario

  I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in

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• (226): View more from Ontario

  Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.

  (519): View more from Ontario

  So you're not picking up this weekend?

  (226): View more from Ontario

  This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.

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• (226): View more from Ontario

  How did I get home last night?

  (519): View more from Ontario

  We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.

  (226): View more from Ontario

  Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht

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• (226): View more from Ontario

  It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone

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• (226): View more from Ontario

  Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16

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• (226): View more from Ontario

  I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..

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• (226): View more from Ontario

  I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage

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• (226): View more from Ontario

  Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.

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• (226): View more from Ontario

  His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice

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• (226): View more from Ontario

  it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was

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