I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2