lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no